To sum up what occurs
for us when we use the DM Process to change behavior and beliefs: We
"recreate" the belief that is responsible for the current,
undesirable behavioral or emotional pattern, thereby experiencing that the
belief is nothing more than one arbitrary, but valid, interpretation of what
actually was seen earlier in life. When it is clear that we never saw the
belief in the world, the belief becomes transformed into just one of many
arbitrary interpretations, at which point it literally disappears as "the
truth."
I want to stress that
the essence of the Decision Maker® Process is not merely
understanding that our belief is an interpretation and having it disappear. The
essence and real value of the Process is creating ourselves as the creator of
our beliefs and -- because our beliefs determine our behavior, emotions, and
perceptions of reality -- as the creator of our lives.
The DM Process
ultimately is more spiritual than psychotherapeutic. By spiritual I mean a
sense of ourselves as beyond or distinct from who we normally think we are,
namely, our body, our beliefs, and the behavior and feelings that stem from our
beliefs. The DM Process appears to be a cognitive gateway to an
altered state of consciousness in which we create and then experience ourselves
as alright just the way we are, as whole and complete, as calm and serene, with
unlimited possibilities and no restrictions outside of ourselves, and with
nothing missing.I changed the
font on the last bit because it should appeal to ACIM students.
From
The following are just
a few of the patterns of behavior that subjects presented and subsequently
eliminated after the
beliefs that caused them were eliminated:
Pattern
|
Beliefs
|
|
1.
|
When I'm
disrespected I get angry and feel like using a gun to shoot the person who
disrespected me to stop the disrespect.
|
I'm not
worthwhile.
I'm not good
enough.
I'm not
important.
The way to
feel important is to be respected.
The way to be
respected is to use a gun.
|
2.
|
Deep down I
feel I won't get the jobs I apply for.
|
I'm not
deserving.
I'm powerless.
I'm helpless.
|
3.
|
Hanging out
with people who use guns and get into trouble.
|
I'm not
important.
I'm alone in
the world.
The way to be
popular is to hang out with the popular crowd and do what they're doing.
|
4.
|
I feel that I
should do better. But every time I try to move ahead, something
pulls me back.
|
I'm not
deserving.
I'm not good
enough.
The judicial
system in Connecticut sucks.
Life is
unfair.
People can't
be trusted.
|
5.
|
I have a great
relationship with my girl, but I'm just waiting for something to go
bad.
|
Women can't be
trusted.
Women lie.
Romantic
relationships don't work.
|
6.
|
I have a hard
time communicating with women. Something is missing when I
try to
communicate.
|
Women are
insecure.
Women are
strongly possessed by emotion, not by reason.
The best way
to protect myself is to stay to myself, isolate myself emotionally, stay out
of the reach of others emotionally.
|
7.
|
A lack of
confidence. Procrastination, rather than a doer. I have positive ideas,
but take
forever to get anything done. Not really having confidence that it will work.
I feel "Good idea, but not for me."
|
I'm not
worthy.
I'm not good
enough.
There's
something wrong with me.
I'm bad.
Life is very
hard, very intimidating, tough, scary.
|
8.
|
I tend not to
express my thoughts and feelings, both negative and positive. I'm quiet and
don't talk in groups. I worry about what others will think of what I'll say.
I feel they'll be negative about me and my ideas.
|
I'm not
worthwhile.
I'm not good
enough.
The way to be
worthwhile is to have people interested in you.
|
9.
|
I always feel
alone. There's no one there for me. If I don't do for me, no one
else will.
When I'm in need, there's no one there.
|
I'm not good
enough.
I'm not
worthy.
|
10.
|
When someone
makes fun of me or my family or my girl, when I'm not
respected,
when I'm not accepted by my peers, I fight.
|
I don't
matter.
I'm not okay.
There's
something wrong with me; I'm crazy. I'm not worthy.
|
11.
|
I disrespect
others and I want to stop that. I make fun of people, "rank" on
them, I pick on people. I bully people. I push them. I feel negative feelings
toward people, critical, and act badly toward them. I don't like that feeling
but feel I can't change me.
|
I'm not good.
Whatever I do
don't matter.
There's
something wrong with me.
I'm not
deserving.
The way to be
okay is to make others look and feel dumb, stupid and dirty.
|
12.
|
I have been a
drug dealer and always will be.
|
There's
something wrong with me.
I'm not
deserving.
The only way
to get respect is to be a drug dealer.
|
13.
|
I try to
impress others. I need to look good in front of high class people.
|
I'm not
important.
The way to be
important is to impress others.
|
14.
|
When someone
tries to get me to do something I don't want to do, I get angry.
|
I'm not
deserving.
What I want
doesn't matter.
|
15.
|
I can't
express what I think.
|
Nobody cares
what I think.
People will
laugh at what I think.
The way to
keep from being hurt is not to express myself.
|
16.
|
I don't trust
people. I have to watch my back. I joined a gang for protection.
|
People will
blackmail you if they can.
Most people
aren't trustworthy.
The world's a
dangerous place to be.
The way to
survive is to do what you got to do, get them before they get you.
|
17.
|
Violence with
women and others. Threaten people with a gun and shoot people. When I feel
that people disrespect me, make me feel like a fool, like I'm nobody, I get
mad. Then I get violent.
|
I don't
matter.
People who
make you feel bad should be punished.
The way to
punish people is to make them feel pain.
|
18.
|
If someone
were to deliberately stand in my face and degrade me (example, call me a
punk) I still feel I'd have to shoot him. But all the other situations that
would have bothered me in the past wouldn't anymore. I could laugh them off,
but not this one situation.
|
Allowing
someone to stand in my face and talk junk to me means I'm not a man.
|
Creation
is the opposite of all illusions, for creation is the truth. We are
creation; we the Sons of God. We seem to be discrete, and unaware
of our eternal unity with Him. Yet back of all our doubts, past all our fears,
there still is certainty. For love remains with all its Thoughts, its sureness
being theirs. God's memory is in our holy minds, which know their oneness and
their unity with their Creator. Let our function be only to let this memory
return, only to let God's Will be done on earth, only to be restored to sanity,
and to be but as God created us.
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