Alone Again Naturally

Have you ever read “Hot Chocolate for the Mystical Lover” about people finding each other. Soul mates? Perhaps. “The Bridge Across Forever: A Love Story” was good too. But they subsequently divorced. Nothing real can be threatened.

In a little while from now
If I'm not feeling any less sour
I promise myself to treat myself
And visit a nearby tower
And climbing to the top will throw myself off
In an effort to make it clear to whoever
What it's like when you're shattered
Left standing in the lurch at a church
Where people saying: "My God, that's tough"
"She stood him up"
"No point in us remaining"
"We may as well go home"
As I did on my own
Alone again, naturally

“I push your buttons.”
Is it true? No.
Can you know absolutely that it’s true? No.
How does that make me feel? Disturbed, let down, disappointed, sad.
What would my life be like without that? A warm loving relationship with someone who accepts me just the way I am. With the hope and faith they are out there.
The turn around:
You push your buttons.
Nobody pushes your buttons.
You let your buttons get pushed.
You give away your power.
I give away my power.
Love is unconditional.

To think that only yesterday
I was cheerful, bright and gay
Looking forward to who wouldn't do
The role I was about to play?
But as if to knock me down
Reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch
Cut me into little pieces
Leaving me to doubt
Talk about God in His mercy
Who if He really does exist
Why did He desert me?
In my hour of need
I truly am indeed
Alone again, naturally

Favorite Christmas present?
Tape measure shaped like a Cuckoo, AM/FM/Cassette Antique radio replica, Knife with flint and all the others that came from my heart.

It seems to me that there are more hearts
Broken in the world that can't be mended
Left unattended
What do we do? What do we do?

Best Christmas? Being with someone special!

Alone again, naturally


Worst Christmas? Having a brother slam the door in my face. We were co-executors and I was trying to get some money released to the other two in time for Christmas. Talked to a lawyer and he got his nose out of joint. Funny, two of them haven’t talked in 7 years.

Looking back over the years
And whatever else that appears
I remember I never cried when my mother died
Never wishing to show the tears
And at sixty-five years old
My father, God rest his soul
Couldn't understand why the only woman
He had ever loved had been taken
Leaving him to start with a heart so badly broken
Despite encouragement from me
No words were ever spoken
And when he passed away
I cried and cried all day
Alone again, naturally
Alone again, naturally

And then I remember:
Never underestimate what it took to convince yourself that the illusion is real and that you are the exact opposite of who you really are.
Wow, I created all this in MY mind. I’m awesome!